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Usually we get to watch loopy christians say loopy stuff in support of their sincere belief in magic here on the the Disservice. Not so much fun today as we are going to look at how belief in magic can warp the moral fibre of people into condoning rape and the abuse of women. Let’s visit our new
shitstain friend over at Christian Husbands.
[ed. I’m almost done and I really need to put a trigger warning on this post because this depraved example of humanity has written a how-to manual on how to dominate and rape your wife all the while being at one with with the loving christian god. This dude plumbs the depths of atrocious human behaviour and morality with the robotic smiley certainty that only absolute religious belief can bring about. Consider yourself warned.]
“As Christians who embrace God’s Word as the guide for our lives, we know that the Bible condones sex ONLY within the bounds of marriage.”
For an all powerful being god sure seems to be obsessed with sex and sexuality. I’m thinking the all-father has no fracks to give about human procreation, priests and clergy though, do have a rather large stiffy when it comes to controlling their flock.
“Our culture’s acceptance of pre-marital sex has been one of the major contributing factors to the decline in marriage, and the rise in cohabitation rates.”
You see, my dear fuck-witted christian misogynist, that is a load of shit. Dudes have been procuring copious amounts of sex from women outside the godly bounds of marriage both before and after the “sexual revolution”. So your problem isn’t premarital sex or cohabitation, it is the unseemly idea that women have choice and free will when it comes to choosing a relationship and their mates.
You know, sort of exercising the type of freedom men have had since day one. This sort of base level expression of female humanity and autonomy – fucks with your shit – and now I sense you’re going to attempt to justify how awesome it was in the good ole days when men were people – and women were not.
“Why buy the cow, when you can get the milk for free?”
Or why get angry and frustrated by vapid christian stupidity when there plenty of other worthwhile causes to spend one’s mental resources on?
Good question, but usually it is the unseemly mix of ignorance, callous piety, and genuine disregard for ethical behaviour that flips enough switches for your moral homunculi to say ‘jumping frog guts, batman! – this amount of aberrant stupid is intolerable – battlestations!
Let’s get this front and centre. Women are not chattel nor are they animals in the sense that they can be bought and sold. Women possess the same level of humanity and autonomy that men do. Our society is sloooooooowly starting to get the idea that we don’t have a second class of people (women). Retrograde biblical shit-lords like BiblicalGenderRoles (BGR) want nothing to do with respecting women and autonomy; especially women outside of their patriarchally approved gender prison.
“I can hear it now – “What about those boys! This is not fair that all the pressure is on the women”. Yes the Scriptures command BOTH men and women to not engage in sex before marriage, and yes they did speak to us as young men about being godly men of integrity, about being gentlemen. However, if you examine the Scriptures closely, you will see that God places the greater burden on the woman to refuse the man. “
The first rule of misogyny is to blame women for the crummy behaviour of men. Quelle surprise! BGR is already going there, let’s watch and see.
“In the Old Testament law, a woman could be executed for not being a virgin when she was married, whereas there was no such punishment for a man that was not a virgin. I realize this goes against our modern “gender equality” ideas, but the Bible supports no such notion.”
Well, looky here! My magic book supports my misogyny because 2000 years ago people treated eachother horribly. We should replicate those norms because they happen to benefit me! Of course…Shitlord goes for broke and continues with the bovine/human female comparison…
“But once you have bought the cow, you ARE supposed to get the milk for free
One of the problems we face today in the Christian community (but it certainly is not limited to Christians) is that often times, even after we have waited, and “bought the cow” (married our wives), our wives expect us to “buy the milk” as well. I recently wrote a post responding to a Christian teacher’s false belief, that in marriage men do in fact have to “buy the milk”(earn sex), even after “buying the cow”(marrying a woman).”
BGR is all about the marital rape. We will now turn to his ugly rape apologia backed up, of course, by those sterling ethical standards found in the bible, for the rest of this episode. If you were ever wavering on the idea that ‘religion poisons everything’ please continue reading and your doubts will be assiduously quelled.
“A quick word on the “cow analogy” before we continue – in no way am I meaning disrespect toward women, or saying that cows are somehow equal to women, or that women are less human than men.”
What is truly abhorrent is that BGR, the High Christian Shitlord of Asstainistan, is aware that he is making an odious comparison. He has enough comprehension and remains of a moral compass to see what he is saying is wrong and hurtful to others. Watch what happens in the next sentence.
“But Biblically speaking, a wife does belong to her husband (men paid a “bride price” and one the terms for husband in the original languages of the Bible is “baal” which means “owner or master” (e.g. Proverbs 31). I Peter 3 says “Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord[master]“.
Did you see that?
Right Fucking There.
That is how toxic religion is to ethical behaviour. I respect women, but my magical religious supersede any moral compuntions I might have and therefore she is not human and not equal, but rather she is property and thus should be treated as such.
(A small break while I gather my words and my amygdala calms down, lets look at some kittehs.)
We’re always pointing out how crazy and terrible ISIL is with their savage acts against humanity, yet we have the exact same suspension of moral rectitude happening here for the exact same reason. Religious belief. It cannot be more starkly clear than what just happened above.
But hey, we need to get back to more biblical justification for immoral actions! Wheee!
“The fact is, in marriage, neither the husband, nor the wife, should have to earn sex. While husband’s denying their wives sexually is a problem sometimes, the vast majority of the time it is the wife denying her husband. Ask any pastor (and I have many pastor friends) and they will confirm this. Ask any marriage counselor, and they will confirm this as well.”
The fuck? You mean that woman are not machines you put kindness coins into until sex comes out? Unpossible!!! !!!
“But there is a difference between flat out denial, which some wives are guilty of, and a woman making her husband earn sex (but both are equally wrong). I once knew a Christian couple, where the only way the man got sex from his wife was when he did the dishes and picked up the house. For other men, it might be buying flowers for your wife, or taking her out to dinner. Please don’t misunderstand me, I don’t think it wrong for a husband to do these kinds of things for his wife, but these things should NEVER be a prerequisite to sex.”
Shitlord honestly believes that women should be subordinate to his penis. You fucking cave dwelling toad – women including your wife owe you exactly jackshit when it comes to sex or anything else. Your insidious world view precludes the idea that women are human beings that have say as to what happens to them. You don’t want a wife you want an obedient fuck-toy to take care of you and your important man-problems and now that women are realizing that submissive rape-toy is not their only role in life you are throwing a herculean mantrum because your ‘peen haz a sad.
You, DGR, are a pathetic, immoral, excuse of a human being, deserving of nothing but scorn and disdain. I happen to have lots of both on tap Shitlord, so lucky for us and bully for you.
“The sinful sexual pattern of modern women
Husbands listen to me, engaged men please hear me. There is a pattern that takes place in a lot of Christian marriages (and non-Christian marriages). At the beginning of the sexual relationship between a man and woman (which should begin after marriage, but sometimes it sinfully starts before marriage), women will give their husbands all the “free milk” they want. She lets him “taste the goods” so to speak.”
Oh, here we go speaking of patterns we’re about to set up the blame women for my important man problems (again).
“But not long into the marriage, the milk is no longer free of charge, it now comes at a cost. That cost looks very different from woman to woman, but there is a cost of some sort. For some Christian men, it might simply be household chores, for others it is buying jewelry or other gifts. For other husbands, it is making a decision the way their wife wants it, but they do not think is best.”
You mean that she probably has your children and house to tend to now and doesn’t have the energy for yoursexy times any more? Completely shocking that she has no energy after dealing with the kids and then going to work, and then coming home to the second shift, that she has no gas left in the tank to worship your ‘peen.
BGR you are a regressive antediluvian ass-clam. Access to pussy is not a fucking human right. Look down. You see that weird dongle at the end of your right arm – its your hand and magically, if you need to release your sexual desires it is just a rum-tug-tuggle away; as a special bonus you don’t need an oppressed class of people to help you do that (unless you are categorically pants-on-head retarded, which I suspect is the case).
How BGR writes is a special treat because he always says something absolutely terrible and then manages in the next paragraph to say something even worse. It must be a special power granted only to those of the Christian Shitlord persuasion.
“What all these different prerequisites have in common is, they require a man to transfer his God given authority over his home, his children, and his wife and yes even his wife’s body to his wife. Only if they do the bidding of their wife, will she give them “the goods”.
Repeat after me Shitlord – “My wife is not my property, she is not my fuck-toilet, she is a human being who has the same rights and bodily autonomy that I do, she “owes” me NOTHING”. In the paragraph above you are contemplating that fact that if you treat your wife as a human being you can’t dominate her and own her like slave. Not having a slave is making you and your ‘peen sad.
From the rest of us who still retain their moral compass: You, Shitlord, are a monster. Know that.
“How to stop this wicked pattern
For you engaged men, or newlywed husbands it will be much easier if you spot this change in your wife and nip it in the bud right away. If you allow this pattern to go on for years of marriage, it only becomes harder (but not impossible) to break. Whether you have been married 6 months, or 6 years, the fix is still the same.”
Shorter Shitlord: How to crush my wife’s spirit and humanity (this was so much easier when it was okay to beat women into submisson) and turn her into the fuck toilet you deserve. (Spoiler: The bible says its okay!!!)
“When your wife tells you “If you do ___________ for me, then I will do that for you”, you need to sit down and take out the Word of God. You must see this as God sees it, as an act of rebellion against your authority over her (and her body), and by extension as an act of rebellion against God himself, because he has given her to you. You need to rebuke your wife’s sinful behavior.”
I can’t even… Women are people, your failure to recognize this fact illustrates the huge gap in your ethics and your reasoning. You have no ‘authority’ over anyone. You are invoking you magic book to justify oppressing another human being. This is past heart of darkness level of depravity and evil. BGR, you need to seek help because you are failing at basic humanity and empathy.
“Take her to I Corinthians and read the Word of God to her:
“Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband.
The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife.
Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.” – I Corinthians 7:3-5(KJV)”
Scare tactics, shame, threats of violence are all considered abuse in this modern secular age. I suggest you get with the fucking program, despite the ‘wisdom’ of your magic book.
“The Bible places absolutely NO preconditions on sex between a husband and wife within the bounds of marriage (contrary to what many Christian books and teachers teach today). In fact the only mutual agreement a couple is called to is, when they STOP having sex for a given period.”
My magic book says that rape is okay, therefore rape is okay and should be encouraged… I’m going to start skipping some stuff as really, the theme that god says its okay to rape women is being done to death.
“After you confront your wife’s rebellion (not only towards God’s command to her, but by extension the authority he has given you) – she is not exactly going to be in the mood, if you know what I mean. It may feel as though you have been unloving to her, but you are in fact loving your wife when you call out her sin, and call her to repentance, just as God calls to all of us.”
After you berate and threaten your wife she might not be in the mood, go figure, you pernicious fuck. See how Patriarchy is interwoven into the very core of religion? See how tightly they collude to force women into submission. The House in Vegas is envious of this system that so effectively combats women’s status as human beings.
“Your wife’s rebellion against your sexual authority over her body is by definition “unrighteousness”. You would in essence, be “unloving” to your wife, from God’s perspective, if you allowed her sinful attitude to go unchecked.”
Gaa… Sexual authority? How about this, go fuck you and your ‘sexual authority’ sideways with the cacti of your choice.
“But should you still have relations with your wife after such a confrontation?
I believe the answer is yes, if she yields to you (even with the wrong attitude). When I first had to confront my wife with these types of issues, I would confront her, and then just leave the sex to happen another night, because after all, I like most men don’t prefer to have sex with my wife when she acts grumpy about it.
Holy fuck – you are advocating raping your wife.
But I realized that the sex still needs to occur, that sex is not about being in the mood, and it is not about feelings, it is about doing what is right. I agree whole heartedly that the best sex a Christian couple can have is when they are spiritually, emotionally and physically connected all at once. But the truth is there will be many times when we don’t have all that in place, but we must still have sex. God wants us to do the right thing, even when we don’t feel like it.”
You are a rapist. The authorities should be notified immediately.
“This probably won’t be a onetime thing
As a Christian husband, and really just as a Christian, we must realize that we all from time to time slip back into patterns of sinful behavior. Please don’t think that if your wife seems to submit to your sexual authority over her body after confronting her with the truth of God’s Word, that this rebellion will never seep back up again in her life. This has definitely not been a onetime thing with my wife, and I have also talked with other Christian men who have told me it is the same with their wives as well.”
This also abuse. Saying no to a sexual advance is NEVER sinful behaviour. Never ever. You are in this paragraph admitting that you are regularly raping your wife and using the bible to justify your criminal behaviour. I hear ISIL is looking for a few good men and let me assure you, you fit their qualifications admirably.
“Can my Christian wife ever say no to my sexual advances?
This is the logical question you as a Christian husband (or engaged man) might ask after everything we have just looked at. The answer to this question is a Christian wife should never give her husband a flat no, BUT she can humbly and gently ask for a delay. There may be legitimate physical or other issues that might prompt your wife to ask you for a delay. But this must be done humbly and respectfully, and always with the attitude in mind that her body does belong to her husband. But a Christian wife should ALWAYS make good on her “rainchecks” with her husband. Also these “delay requests” from wives should be the exception, and not the normal response to a husband’s sexual advances.”
Oh how beneficent is this? The sex slave can ask for a temporary halt to the rape train – how fucking convivial.
This person and their thoughts sicken me. This sort of attitude toward women has no place in a civilized society. This sick fuck should be in prison, end of story.
For more hilarity(?), see Violet Wisp’s take-down of this rapist’s post.
More than you’d think really. Human beings seem to intrinsically value fairness and equality and yet, as of today have constructed societies based on moving as far away as possible from any sort of equitable norm.
Take note of the piece on John Rawls and how using the Veil of Ignorance idea as a cognitive filter for making decisions. I think it is a great idea adding to the list of processes one should go through in making tough decisions in the personal, moral and political sphere.
“Pornography has socialized a generation of men into watching sexual torture,” Dines said. “You are not born with that capacity. You have to be trained into it. Just like you train soldiers to kill. If you are going to carry out violence against a group you have to dehumanize them. It is an old method. Jews become kikes. Blacks become niggers. Women become cunts. And no one turns women into cunts better than porn.”
-Gail Dines, quoted By Chris Hedges in “Pornography is What the End of the World Looks Like“.
We’ve all heard plenty about the so-called “friend zone”, which is where a person you want to date, just wants to be friends, and somehow that’s unfair and bad and mean. Let me tell you about its converse, the Un-Friend Zone.
A while back at work, we got a new deskside support/IT guy. He quickly identified me as the person in the department to talk to, because I know what I’m doing – and what everybody else is doing – with computers (even if they don’t). We were going through a major hardware and software upgrade at the time, so IT Guy came around a lot. He and I would get to chatting while he was working, and we discovered we had lots of nerdy things in common. We really hit it off together. We started chatting over instant messaging when he wasn’t around in person, and he really brightened slow days for me – and I assume I did the same for him. I was happy because I don’t make friends easily, and yay, a new friend! It got to the point where I was considering asking Arb if I could invite him to join our tabletop roleplaying group, because I thought it would be fun to be outside-work friends as well as work-friends. I was positive it was strictly a platonic thing, because he was at least ten years younger than me, and I’m not conventionally attractive, and he never said anything remotely flirtatious and neither did I.
Then one day, I said the fateful words: “My husband…” The conversation faltered. (It’s not like I was keeping Arb a secret, just that I’m not one of those people who’s constantly all “My husband this…” and “My husband that…” and “Well my husband says…” to every opinion offered.)
He didn’t message me the next day like he usually did, so I messaged him. He was really terse. I messaged him again a couple days later, same thing. And the other IT guy started coming for all our deskside support calls.
Ladies and gentleman, behold the Un-Friend Zone: where you think you’re making a new friend, and the other person wants more than friendship, and then when it turns out you don’t feel that way about them, they drop you like a hot potato. Obviously there can be hurt feelings involved, and that could require some space to get over; I get that. But on this end of the stick it feels like it wasn’t worth spending time with me and getting to know me, if the payoff isn’t going to be a sexual/romantic relationship. And that’s crappy. (It’s not a gendered phenomenon either; Arb has had women do it to him as well.)
I don’t think I have an obligation to be constantly flashing a verbal neon sign that says MARRIED MARRIED MARRIED MARRIED, just in case somebody is attracted to me and I don’t realise it. On the other hand, I really object when the opening line from a stranger initiating conversation is an inquiry about my sexual availability. (and yes, this happened to me frequently before I aged/fatted out of the prime fuckability category) I don’t know what the solution is. But I wish people who are looking for mates, wouldn’t object to making platonic friends along the way.
Dear Religious people,
Have you thanked your local atheist today? If not, you should because atheism and by extension secular society, is saving you from the immoral loopy shit your bronze age beliefs demand. The latest demonstration of how immoral and barbaric religion is comes to us from the Sudan. (read more about Mariam at Al Jazeera)
“Mariam Yehya Ibrahim, a Sudanese mother, doctor and Christian, has been sentenced to flogging and death unless she recants her Christian faith. She is 8 months pregnant and has a two-year-old son. Please, join the international community in asking Sudan not to execute her for being a Christian.”
You “go hard” there Islam – the religion of peace and friend to women across the globe.
“Ibrahim is charged with adultery on the grounds that her marriage to a Christian man from South Sudan is considered void under Shari’a law, for which the penalty is flogging. She’s also charged with apostasy, or abandonment of religion, for which the penalty is death.”
Well you can see the problem here, obviously, that if you decide to change from one fatuous belief system to another, the penalty is death. Funny we don’t hear about these sorts of things in North America. You can thank god that the United States wasn’t founded as christian nation – if it was, this sort of egregious crime against humanity would be common place in the lower 48 all the time.
You know why it isn’t? (hint: rhymes with ‘Fecularism’)
The very secular foundations of society that the christian right is chipping away at are the very same foundations that are preserving the “not-allowing-stupid-religious-shit-to-go-down” haven that Americans inhabit.
Witness the fucking evilly deranged face of theocratic rule and tell me that this is what you want for your society? Getting a little closer to god gets you a little closer to barbarity. How depraved must one be, in the pursuit of a religious based society, to somehow think that theocratic rule is good?
“Mariam is the daughter of a Christian woman and Muslim man. She was raised Christian after her father left. However, Sudanese law mandates that children born to Muslim fathers are considered Muslim.
The fact that a woman could be sentenced to death for her religious choice, and to flogging for being married to a man of an allegedly different religion is abhorrent.”
This does NOT happen in modern secular society.
Your pious objections to secularism are noted; you can now sit the fuck down and shut the fuck up and think about the good that secularism has done for you and your freedom to believe in vacuous mythology of your choice. Maybe, just maybe, instead of campaigning for and electing people with ‘good christian values’ you could decide to support someone that is defending your very (comfortable) way of life, here in reality, where it matters.
Continue to erode the secular aegis at your own peril.
Lastly, get off your damn knees, stop praying, and go do something useful for once – sign the petition to save Mariam’s life.
If you have not picked up or borrowed Blood Lands: Europe Between Hitler and Stalin by Timothy Snyder yet, I suggest you do so. It is a shockingly candid dissertation on what happened to the people on the Eastern Front between Stalin and Hitler. I quote from that text:
“Partisan operations, effective as they sometimes were, brought inevitable destruction to the Belarusian civilian population, Jewish and gentile alike. When the Soviet partisans prevented peasant from giving food to the Germans, they all but guaranteed that the Germans would kill the peasants. A Soviet gun threatened a peasant, and then a German gun killed him. Once the Germans believed that they had lost control of a given village to the partisans, they would simply torch the houses and the fields. If they could not reliably get grain, the could keep it from the Soviets by seeing that it was never harvested. When Soviet partisans sabotaged trains, they were in effect ensuring that the population near the site would be exterminated. When Soviet partisans laid mines, they knew that some would detonate under the bodies of Soviet Citizens. The Germans swept mines by forcing locals, Belarusians and Jews, to walk hand in hand over minefields. In general, such loss of human life was of little concern to the Soviet leadership. The people who died had been under German occupation, and were therefore suspect and perhaps even more expendable than the average Soviet citizen. German reprisals also ensured that the ranks of the partisans swelled, as survivors often had no home, no livelihood, and no family to which to return.
The Soviet leadership was not especially concerned with the plight of Jews. After November 1941 Stalin never singled out the Jews as victims of Hitler. Some partisan commanders did try to protect the Jews. But the Soviets, like the Americans or the British, seem not to have seriously contemplated direct military action to rescue Jews. The logic of the Soviet system was always to resist independent initiatives and to value life very cheaply. Jews in ghettos were aiding the German war effort as forced laborers, so their death over pits was of little concern to the authorities in Moscow. Jews who were not aiding but hindering the Germans were showing signs of a dangerous capacity for initiative, and might later resist the reimposition of Soviet rule. By Stalinist logic, Jews were suspect either way: if they remained in the ghetto and worked for the Germans, of if they left the ghetto and showed a capacity for independent action. The previous hesitation of local Minsk communists turned out to be justified: their resistance organization was treated as a front of the Gestapo by the Central Staff of the Partisan Movement in Moscow. The people who rescued Minsk Jews and supplied Soviet partisans were labeled a tool of Hitler.”
-Timothy Snyder. Bloodlands, Europe Between Hitler and Stalin. p 238-239.
That is a small sliver of what war is. The systematic destruction of empathetic thoughts in pursuit of ideology and conformity.
The first step – always the first step – is to identify another human being as the ‘other’. Once that othering has been established there is no evil, no heinous action, that is out of reach. (Funny how religious belief is all about othering, but I’m sure it’s a completely different situation.)
This book is best read in small doses, as it is chock full of humanity doing horrible things to itself. Consider yourself warned.