Think you’re immune to social constructs? Think again.
“Let’s examine that a bit. “Men don’t see dirt the way women do.” That’s a pretty common assertion. And it’s bullshit. Vision problems aside, we’re all seeing the same dirty house; we’re just interpreting it differently. You and your boyfriend both walk in, see the pile of crap on the kitchen counter, and have different reactions to it. You likely think, “Man, that pile of crap is really bugging me. I should really clean it up a little.” He likely sees it and thinks, “Huh. Pile of crap. It’ll get taken care of.”
Why does he think that? Well, because we’re dealing with endless generations of social gender constructs that tell us that taking care of the home is “women’s work.” Whether you or your boyfriend or your parents or your peer group believe these constructs is largely irrelevant, though, because it’s so deeply ingrained in our society that it permeates every level of culture: You see it in TV shows, movies, commercials, in the workplace, in literature, and in almost every facet of life. There’s no escaping it.
So when someone says, “Men don’t see dirt the way women do,” what they’re actually saying is, “Men have been conditioned over generations to process the dirt that they see in a way that requires no further action on their part.” It’s not genetic. It’s learned. And it can be unlearned.”
The take away of this is in the last line. Learned behaviours can be altered over time. So no more weak excuses people. :)
6 comments
December 22, 2015 at 5:35 am
roughseasinthemed
That was quite an interesting post. Especially the comments.
Luckily I can ignore the washing-up long enough for him to do it :)
He sees it differently ;)
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December 22, 2015 at 9:02 am
The Arbourist
@RSitM
You should meet The Intransigent One (TIO) as your views on this particular topic seem to be in concurrence. :)
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December 22, 2015 at 11:09 am
The Intransigent One
I’m not ignoring it! Really! I’m just going to do it later…. much, much later…
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December 22, 2015 at 3:33 pm
roughseasinthemed
In fact so much later … that it’s gone :)
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December 23, 2015 at 4:38 am
bleatmop
I remember one time shortly after moving in together with my wife about how I was learning her neat freak status. I was trying to study and she was cleaning all around me. It was really starting to annoy me because any time I put something down she would “tidy” it. I think she was getting annoyed too for some odd reason. Anyway, the moment I had enough was when she was roving back and forth waiting for me to put something down. I tore a tiny corner off of the page I was reading, looked at her straight in the eye and then I dropped it on the floor. I think I almost died that day.
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December 30, 2015 at 2:54 pm
The Arbourist
@intransigentia and RSitM
*sigh*
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