Just started reading Hooks’ treatise on Love.  Only twenty two pages but already word-gold is present:

  One of the most important social myths we must debunk if we are to become a more loving culture is the one that teaches parents that abuse and neglect can coexist with love.  Abuse and neglect negate love.  Care and affirmation, the opposite of abuse and humiliation, are the foundation of love.  no one can rightfully claim to loving when behaving abusively.  Yet parents do this all the time in our culture.  Children are being told that they are loved even though they are being abused.

   It is a testimony to the failure of loving practice that abuse is happening in the first place.

-bell hooks.  All About Love. p.22

Seems like simple stuff right?  Slam it into real life contexts though with raising and living with children and just watch the complexity mushroom.  Discipline and family interactions need to be constantly evaluated and reflected upon to see if this simple sounding maxim is being maintained.

 

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